Day 6: Step outside our comfort zone
Today, let's talk about stepping out of our comfort zone and displaying our style boldly to the world
If you have it, you can make anything look good.”
~ Diane Von Furstenberg ~
We are forever evolving, along with our lifestyles, therefore it should be of no surprise that so too will our style.
In order to keep up with these changes, we need to be willing to experiment.
According to celebrity stylist Rachel Zoe, “your style is a lot like any long-term relationship – if you don’t shake things up once in a while and experiment, boredom sneaks in.”
We may consider experimenting at various milestones of our life or we may consider experimenting ever so slightly on a more frequent basis.
On a day-to-day basis, experimentation might take the form of the way we roll or scrunch our sleeves, how we tuck our shirt, or even the way we tie our scarf. We may also wish to experiment with our makeup, maybe throw on a bright coloured lippie now and then or maybe go the other way and experiment with wearing less makeup.
Experimenting at various milestones, (e.g. a big birthday; landing a new job; having kids) may look a little different and might take more time. On these milestones, we may like to seek some fresh inspiration.
Stepping out of our comfort zone
‘Comfort’ is a three-pronged conversation when it comes to style.
Style must be comfortable in terms of how our clothes fit and feel on our body. If we don’t feel comfortable in our clothes, we won’t feel comfortable in ourselves, and therefore we will find ourselves readjusting all day, both mentally and physically. This only serves to communicate our insecurities to the world, rather than who we truly are.
When our style is in sync with our inner self, we’ll feel a sense of comfort that is absolutely empowering.
Our comfort zone, which at times can be referred to as The Danger Zone, because at times we can get dangerously comfortable. When it comes to defining or revamping our style, we will need to be prepared to leave our comfort zone and move into the creative zone. Yes, we absolutely will feel vulnerable and nervous as we leave this zone, but this is natural and we need to push through these feelings.
All three types of ‘comfort’ are important to listen to when defining our inner style.
Trusting your instincts
As we get to know and accept ourself, our true instincts will start to surface. The more we tune into our authentic self, the easier it will be for us to hear what our instincts are saying.
As we start to trust these instincts, we’ll start to feel liberated. No longer will we wear clothes that we think we ‘should’ wear. Instead, we will start wearing clothes that we are naturally drawn to; those that instinctively speak to our personal taste.
Too often, we concern ourselves with what other people might think of us, berating ourselves with: ‘What if we dress a little differently... what will people think?’ But we need to remember that this is actually the goal – to express our true selves, and no one else.
Today we are going to focus on our ability to experiment.
So, taking what we now know about our canvas, our existing wardrobe and, most importantly, our mood and inspiration board – let's head to the shops and try some things on... no buying.. just trying.
Another option, given the current circumstances, go to your partners, a friends, or family members wardrobe and experiment with their threads and accessories.
Meanwhile, jot down your findings in your style guide page 29
What did you like?
What did you dislike?
What garment length suited you best?
What necklines flattered your body shape?
Which colours worked well with your skin tone?
What styles surprised you?
Our aim today, is to gain a better understanding of what it takes to display our style boldly to the world.
We will discuss the following attributes and the importance each plays in formulating our style.
Stepping out of our comfort zone
Trusting our instincts
Sigh... even typing that has made me exhausted.
These attributes are not easy and being willing to do just one, let alone five, is huge!
Let's dive a little more into each one.
As we rediscover our authentic self and learn to accept all our glorious imperfections, we will then face the ultimate challenge: Vulnerability.
As Brene Brown put it so beautifully: “Most people believe vulnerability is weakness. But really, vulnerability is courage. We must ask ourselves... are we willing to show up and be seen?”
I believe vulnerability is the key that unlocks great style. It is what emboldens us to embrace our own style and put ourselves on display. People with a superior sense of style choose to be vulnerable with the world every day. They choose to show up and be seen.
I used to think confidence only came from looking perfect. I would feel confident only after I had put effort into my appearance and felt the reflection in the mirror met the status quo. Throughout my own self-acceptance journey, I’ve come to realise that confidence doesn’t actually have anything to do with this. Confidence starts and finishes with self-acceptance.
“If you love something and it makes you feel great, wear it. I have two young daughters, so I don’t like anything that tears women down. If you want to wear a hot pink tutu and Dr. Martens, I am the first person to say I love it... it’s really about confidence.”
~ Melissa McCarthy
“If you put something together and it doesn’t look so good, the fashion police are not going to come and take you away.
And if they do, you might have some fun in jail.”
~ Iris Apfel~